Pulled, Mold ‘n Cold

My three loyal readers may have noticed that I haven’t posted anything for awhile. This is because:

a) It’s summertime; b) we’ve been gone a lot, which means I have alot to blog, which means I don’t want to blog because it’s too much work; and c) my Adult ADD (a “friend” diagnosed me) inspired an eight-week long indifference to blogging. The cycle has completed itself, however, and I now hope to make a Travolta-esque comeback.


I am fully planning to do a long, painfully boring “catch-up” post with pictures of my cute kids and family reunions. In the meantime, however, I felt it only right that I share with you the three real highlights of my summer. These will be listed from the least to the most important, although they’re all huge:

1. My first ever successfully-grown head of lettuce.

I’ve planted gardens before (with very little success), and was always told it was too hot to grow lettuce here. What do those Master Gardeners know? My garden is actually kickin’ this year, and I’m so excited! I snipped this lettuce for a tasty Sunday salad. Harvesting and eating out of my backyard? Totally blogworthy for me.

2. My first ever Jell-o Mold

I reluctantly made this for Megan’s baptism/4th of July barbeque. I have always had strong views on Jell-0, like the abolitionists had strong views on slavery. My husband, on the other hand, loves it. For 10 years I’ve protected my children from this particular bit of Mormon kitsch. Derrick, however, thinks I’m cruelly depriving them of a colorful (read: slimy) piece of Americana. This year, as my daughter’s religious rite of passage transpired within the Season of Jell-0, I decided to offer my family their own edible rite of passage with a patriotic, layered ring. I gagged down a small bite (yep, it’s still nasty), but the rest of my family inhaled it with gusto. It made a real big dent in our otherwise highbrow culinary habits.

And don’t think just because this is a white trash dessert that it was easy to make. It was a major pain in my white trash backside, what with the multiple layers and all. (And please forgive my messy, white trash fridge. We had tons of company. It’s usually spotless, really.)

3. My first ever Slurpee

I took my first sip of this icy, chemical concoction a few months ago when treating my kids one hot spring day. Would you believe I’d never, ever bought one before? It was love at first slurp, especially since they have Crystal Light flavors now. No calories, no carbonation, no caffeine…that pretty much qualifies it as a health food, right?

And here’s the real bragging right: Our 7-11, on Clearwater Avenue here in Kennewick, Washington…yes, my humble hometown…is the SLURPEE CAPITOL OF THE WORLD. You think I’m kidding right now. I am not kidding. They sell more Slurpees than any other 7-11 in America (hence, the world), and consequently have the largest Slurpee flavor selection anywhere. I think it’s around twenty-five flavors. (Still not kidding.) They have a banner out front and, more recently, a ten-foot trophy (still not kidding) inside with a massive metal cup on the top. I dare you to go in and ask one of the proud cashiers about their store’s status as International Slurpee champions. If you can get out of there in less than twenty minutes, I’ll buy you an AppleMango 42-ouncer myself.

My one complaint? The term slurpee. Couldn’t we call it an iced-fruit beverage or even a slushed punch? There’s gotta be a way for a grown woman to drink up in a more dignified (un-white trash) manner.