Happy Maholo-giving!

Was it the day before yesterday or the day before that? I figure this salt water is taking care of business, so I’ve kind of lost track.

It was the day before the day before yesterday.

I think.

I can’t be sure.

The only thing I’m sure of is that roasting a turkey in your wet swimsuit is a holiday tradition worth keeping.

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Happy Thanksgiving.  That I spared you the swimsuit/turkey photo can now be added to your list of things-to-be-grateful for. That, and that you didn’t have to use pink plastic plates to serve pies made by Sara Lee.  (Although her pumpkin one’s not bad.  Not bad at all.)

Say no to “Say Yes to the Dress?”

You know you’re a bad mom when you overhear your twelve-year old daughter shout “Yes!”  to the tv.

“What is it, honey?” you ask from the computer, feigning interest.

Finally, Netflix has Say Yes to the Dress: Bridesmaids on!”

“What’s that?”

“It’s Say Yes to the Dress but it involves like five or ten bridesmaids, and they’re all trying to agree on one dress.”  Pauses for what seems like drama, but is really just the momentary distraction of queuing up Season One.  She then continues.

“Mom, this show is intense!”  You know you’re a bad mom when you hear what your daughter’s idea of “intense” is.  (You always thought it referred to something of great force, degree, or strength.  But apparently it refers to Say Yes to the Dress:  Bridesmaids.)

But you know you’re a really bad mom when, without looking up, you just nod your head, mutter “cool” and get back to writing your blog post.  Hey, you tell yourself, there’s many a great life lesson to be learned from that show.  The first being:  do not, under any circumstances or ego expansiveness, wear a tiara and veil to your own sister’s wedding.  Your status as Maid of Honor does not excuse this.*

*Which brings me, far too late, to Pippa Middleton.  I still can’t quite believe that she wore a white dress to her sisters wedding–you know, that sister who just happens to be the, um…Princess of Wales!  How could she compete with Kate in that gorgeous white gown? (And in that gorgeous body?  Even worse.)  I’d kill my sister if she showed up to my wedding looking that good–and that bridal.  (No offense to either of my sisters.)  (But I’d kill you.)

Rule of thumb?  If it wouldn’t fly on Say Yes to the Dress:  Bridesmaids, it shouldn’t fly on the Royal Wedding.  And I’m pretty sure that none of those bridezillas on Say Yes would allow their minions to hijack their hotness like that.  I mean, really:  where are the English manners?