a.m.

This morning, Ethan came into my room and crawled into bed with me, flopping down for a giant, good-morning bear hug.  It was heavenly.  He was warm and groggy and just barely young enough, I knew, to still want to snuggle with his dorky old mom.  He’s my last child and will turn six in a few months.  These moments are quickly disappearing, I thought, and all the better because of it.  I wanted to stay there all day, hugging him and kissing that massive, sweaty white head.  I lay in bed, swimming in these tender thoughts and wondering what I could say to show him the fullness of my heart.  I then felt something tickle me, and looked down to see that he was burrowing his nose directly under my arm.  I heard a muffled cry come up from under the covers, and couldn’t quite understand what he was saying.

“It mulls fulov marmpis ineere!”

“What was that, honey?”  I smiled.  This was all so sweet.

“I said, grosss!  It smells full of armpits in here!”

Ah.  They grow up so fast.

I’d give anything to slow it down.

It was big. It was blue. It was skeery.

Last Friday night, my husband dressed up as a Blue Man, as in The Blue Man Group.

He has not worn a costume once in the fifteen years we’ve been married, and this year, suddenly, he presents himself as such.  Why?  you might ask.  (That’s what I asked.)

Rewind to Halloween 2009.  Apparently, somewhere in the midst of the raging ward party, Derrick and three other un-costumed men made a brother’s pact that they would each come as a member of The Blue Men this year.  One of them backed out to support his kids in a family costume.  (I guess Ian thinks he’s a good dad or something.)  But the other two made good on their promise.

Are any of you familiar with the prematurely cancelled show Arrested Development?  That’s Don posed as Tobias, the “never nude,” on the right.  (Don’t ask.  Please don’t ask.)

These costumes were not scary or inappropriate.  There is certainly nothing risque about the Blue Man Group.  And yet, the whole thing seemed wrong.  I’m not sure why.  But somehow, it was all:  wrong.

And speaking of wrong:

That’s me on the right, dressed up as Princess Leia to coordinate with my son’s costume.  Problem: dress looks like a toga and my wig is actually called a “hip hop afro.”  (I”m not being politically incorrect here.  That’s really what it’s called.)

I couldn’t find a Princess Leia wig.  I thought the dark color and rounded side puffytails of this wig could pass as Leia’s ‘do.

I was wrong.  Very wrong.

Instead, I look like Minnie Mouse.  Or a female matadora.  Or a hip hop dancer, which would utilize this wig in the manner for which it was created.  So we’ll go with that.

I put on a bunch of extra makeup, hoping to capture some of Leia’s glamour.  I’m thinking:  not quite.  But have you heard?

Miss Nelson Is Missing.

Then, of course, there’s the typecasting:

She threw this costume together five minutes before the party.  This woman’s going to outlive us all.

Now that we’re done with the skeery costumes, let’s treat ourselves to some cuteness:

“Tonks” from Harry Potter, Book Five.  Do you know her?  (Neither did I.)  But whoever she is, she’s pretty stinkin’ cute.  (I’m dreading the day, however, when Rache adopts this look for high school.)

Meg and her cousin, Bailie, dressed up as “babies.”  Believe it or not, their pacifiers were battery operated and lit up quite spectacularly.  For the duration of the night, they looked up at potential candygivers and meowed out a softy, pouty little “trick-or-treat” in unison baby voices.  It was insufferable.  (But darn cute, too, as they were well aware.)

And then there was Yoda.  No family Halloween is complete without a Yoda.

I’m sorry, but I thought this was the most delightful thing I saw all weekend.  Maybe ever.  Notice the dual-weaponry of lightsaber and walking stick.  A Jedi is always prepared.

Green face paint:  check.  Homemade felt ears: check.  Large piece of brown felt with hole for head:  check.  Wise words flowing freely all night–such as, “I gotta booger in my nose!  I can’t get it out with all this paint on my face!”–check.  (Doesn’t he know that it’s “booger I got…?”)

The highlight of the evening was that, come party time, Rachael’s Baked Potato Soup won third prize in the big soup cook-off and my Pumpkin Bisque somehow got second.  (Rachael’s should have beat mine.  Everybody knew it.)  Rachael made the entire pot herself and even came up with the secret ingredient that I personally believe put it in the winner’s circle.  (hint:  salt and fat makes everything taste better.  oink.)

I’m thankful for fun kids and a great Halloween, but mostly I’m thankful, as I am every year, that Halloween is over.

In fact, I’m so thankful that, if I were a monster created by a mad scientist, my name would be Thankenstein.

(loved the card, aunt connie.  i’ve been waiting for a month to put that on my blog.)

And off they go…

to another year of school.

(Warning:  another dull catch-up post from my Aug/Sept. nonblogging run.  Sorry.)

It comes every fall, and every fall it’s bittersweet.  Happy for them, sad for me, happy for me.  We had a lot of big changes this year:  Rachael started middle school (!), Megan started a new elementary school, and Ethan started kindergarten.  Naturally, these milestones have occurred under the roof of my parents’ house, which will create lasting memories for my children of that cherished season of their childhood in which Mom and Dad couldn’t get their crap together.  My good kids bear it well.  And they were each thrilled to tackle their new adventures.  I was excited for them.  Kind of.

Skinny-jeaned up and ready to go.  Rachael was so excited for middle school.

Dorky Mom has to take a picture of her walking to the building.  Yes, I have attachment issues.

Megan has a gift for knowing just how much bling is required to make an impression at a new elementary school. (I can only dream of being cute enough to pull off a sparkly silver scarf in August.)

Ethan has a will as steely as the metallic guitars on his shirt, and we fought hard over this outfit.  I wanted him to wear a classy new white polo and plaid shorts I’d bought him, but Ethan’s no dummy.  He knows what kind of clothes get you beat up on the playground.

Ethan was dying to ride the bus to school, so after several days of positive self-talk, I finally let him.  I have never had any of my kids ride the bus before, so this was a big stretch for me.  It’s like a little adventure every day and he absolutely loves it.

I must admit, I was a little depressed after dropping the kids off the first morning.  Okay, really depressed.  As in, teary-eyed-all-day-long-depressed.  But as soon as I picked up Rache and saw her face all lit up with excitement, gushing about how cool middle school is, my mood lifted.  Megan gave the same glowing review, as did Ethan with kindergarten.  I’m sad my kids are slowly leaving my side, but I’m so thankful that they like school.  And now that we’re into it, I’m really just happy to have a little break every day.  (My motherly sentiment always gives way, eventually, to my womanly selfishness.)

And now I want to know from you, my three faithfuls:  What are you happiest/saddest about with the coming of the new school year?  I really want to know–it will make me feel better.  Don’t even think of reading this and bypassing the comment section.  (Do I need to name names, Ashley/Emily/Rachel/Cheryl/Brooks/Stephanie?)  No, I’ve decided against naming names.  You know who you are.